Not letting your past define your future
It’s easy to accept that the events of our past affect us in the present. But, although they inevitably have their influence, historical events don’t have to define who we are and how we live. We do have a choice.
We all deserve the best health possible; whether that’s our physical health or mental health. The trouble is that the traumatic events of our past can get in the way of our good mental health and can have long term affects if left unresolved.
We all can understand how this type of long term trauma can be associated with highly traumatic events such as those experienced with violent crime, war, or people who work in our emergency services. These types of events are both significant and extreme.
This does not mean that our own personal experiences are any less important. Things like family conflicts, relationship difficulties, significant loss, serious illness, accidents and work conflicts are all experiences which can also have long-term effects on our mental health.
These type of events can be sudden or they can build over a period of time. Either way, they can develop into things like depression, anxiety disorders, panic attacks, phobias and other long-term debilitating emotional difficulties.
Taking control of your life and moving forward in the way that you would want is an important part of living well and enjoying life. And it is a real choice.
Prince Harry made headlines recently when he publicly spoke about the grief he harboured for 20 years after the death of his mother, Princess Diana, and how he needed counselling to enable him to process those issues and move forward positively with his life.
Hazelwood Counselling Services provides counselling that really works to the local areas of Retford, Worksop, Doncaster, Newark and Gainsborough as well as wider areas such as Sheffield, Lincoln, Nottingham and Chesterfield.
Kerri Schad is Hazelwood Counselling said “Troubles in childhood such as neglect, parents separating, abuse, domestic violence, being in an unhappy home… Experiences like this can adversely effect a child’s emotional development. In adulthood, it can impact on our confidence, esteem, self-worth and how we relate to others.”
“It sets up that internal belief that “you’re not good enough”, “not lovable”, or that trusted people are going to leave you. These types of beliefs can lead to unhappiness and dissatisfaction”.
“It doesn’t have to be like this. We don’t have to put on a brave face and tell ourselves we should paint on a happy smile. There are ways of getting through these difficulties and sometimes, we all need a bit of help” said Kerri.
If you are considering counselling, you can talk to your GP who may be able to access free counselling for you or you can seek a private counsellor for yourself.
If you decide to seek a counsellor for yourself then choose one that’s properly qualified and accredited. The Counselling Directory (www.counselling-directory.org.uk) undergo checks to make sure everyone they list is properly qualified and belongs to a professional body.